Ok young ladies… ready to yap about a few things? Let's talk about voices… not that lovely singing voice you use while driving or singing in the shower, or the voice you use playing a part on stage… I’m talking about the voice that makes YOU… well, YOU!
Here’s a quote by Josie Geller (played by Ms. Drew Barrymore) from the film “Never Been Kissed.”
“There is a big world out there… bigger than prom, bigger than high school and it won’t matter if you were prom queen, the quarterback of the football team, or the biggest nerd in school. Find out who you are and try not to be afraid of it.”
Easier said than done, right? I know it was for me. I was almost 30 before I found my voice and figured out who I was. And young ladies… let me tell you… I missed out on a lot because I was such a late-bloomer in soooo many ways.
I was painfully shy; so shy I never raised my hand in class… I mean NEVER. Crazy, right?! The idea of raising my hand and having everyone turn and look at me, and the potential of me uttering something totally stupid… just terrified me. So, I avoided it, never did it, and as a result, my shyness held me back in many ways. And, do you know what a HUGE responsibility it is to constantly “handle” being shy? I was always thinking ahead… I would tell myself before classes “don’t look the teacher in the eye, or he might call on you.” If I were going to a party, I would think soooo hard about topics I could talk about with people that would make me sound interesting. Because I was so busy “handling” my shyness, I didn’t have time to figure out who I was!
Oh yeah… then there was the time a guy I was on a date with told me, “You need to go to the store and buy a personality.” And, I went out with him AGAIN!!! Why?! Because he was a cool guy, and I was a not-so-cool-girl, and I thought dating him would “elevate” my status. Now I know that was a stupid thing to do… keep hanging out with someone who says hurtful things like “go buy a personality”. Crazy again, right?!
All of these experiences, thoughts, feelings… they are all just a part of finding your voice and figuring out who you are. Unfortunately, none of us are born with instructions on how to find our voices. But, that’s why it’s soooo cool to explore and figure it out! The possibilities are endless!
So… how can you find your voice within you?
- Try this… quickly, name three things that make you deliriously joyful. I mean super-sonic, can’t-get-enough-of-it-in my-heart JOYFUL. Now, look at the three words and genuinely feel them within your soul. Take a bit of time to really think about these things that bring you JOY.
- Now try this… quickly name three things that make you uber angry. I mean crazy-mad, want-to-punch-your-hand-through-a-wall ANGRY. Look at the three words and again, genuinely feel them within your soul.
So, guess what?! You just started on the journey to figuring out YOU! These six words may seem quite small on paper, but they are HUGE with respect to understanding your voice, what fills you with joy, and what makes you angry.
Try some other exercises… quickly list three women that you look up to; women that inspire you when you hear them speak. The woman can be someone you know personally, or she could be someone you’ve never met. Regardless, look at the three women you wrote down on paper and think about WHY you chose them… WHY they inspire you. I’m telling you, if you take a bit of time to jot these things down AND just think about them, deep within… even think about them over the course of a few days or weeks… if you do this, I promise you will begin to understand your voice, and who you are on the inside.
That’s when the FUN begins… now, you start to use your voice… LOUDLY, CONFIDENTLY, RESPECTFULLY, and OFTEN. There's no one else out there in this big, magical world precisely like you… with a voice like you… use your voice to show the world who you are… every day.
Keep walking towards your magic… and be a girl like YOU...